Vocabulary

Build your vocabulary.

Electile Dysfunction: the inability to become aroused over any of the choices for President put forth by either party in the 2012 election year.

DFAIT Etiquette Course -- Day 1

(Thanks to Jim Elliott for passing this on. I hope he gets the rest of the course soon.)

DAY 1 FOREIGN AFFAIRS

DRESS AND DEPORTMENT

Remove the lampshade before entering the dining hall, as there will be no place for it at the table. Spats should always be buckles out, with tabs to the back, and be sure to adjust your loincloth before you sit, so as not to soil the chairs with sweat.

CONVERSATAION

While waiting for service to begin, commentary on decor is allowed, but should be kept to a minimum with consideration given the cultural sensitivities of your host and the current political climate between Canada and your host. Comparing the draperies to Muhammar Qudhaffi's wardrobe and reminding your host "Look how well the worked out for him! " and making the finger pistol to your head is probably not going to win points, unless you have been directed to do so by the PMO.

Exclamations of delight at excellent plating design should be kept short with no use of the word "fucking", and as always, if it is not in the Oxford Concise it is NOT a word.

Avoid colloquial speech of the region. While you may feel you have mastered some local usages of otherwise casual seeming speech, you may accidentally offend your host, or someone in his or her entourage. The same usage that triggers an indulgent guffaw from British Royalty may get you shot at a Republican Primary. Remember, in most of the world outside the United Kingdom and it's former colonies, these people are ARMED generally.

CONDUCT

Should your host serve something with a face or part of a face, smacking it with a candelabra while grunting alarm and shrieking is not appropriate, unless your host does it first, then by all means, continue.

Gun play is strictly forbidden, unless your host does it first.

Humping the wait staff's leg? Unless your host does it first do not.

Elbows off the Table

Administrative Notices

Introduction to Business and Dining Etiquette course

From:	Ioana Bratianu, Program Coordinator, Centre of Learning for International Affairs and Management (CFSD)
To:	All employees at Headquarters
Date:	2012-01-30
Summary:	This course, offered February 6, 2012, is designed to familiarize participants with the basic rules of business and dining etiquette.

This course is designed to familiarize participants with the basic rules of business and dining etiquette. The restaurant setting will give them an opportunity to put in practice their abilities in a real-life scenario. Participants will also learn how to adjust their etiquette and protocol to various cultures that they interact with, and will have the opportunity to practise using culture specific scenarios.

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DFAIT Successes in 2011

The top accomplishments of 2011 highlighted by the Minister included:

• the entry into force of the Canada-Colombia Free Trade Agreement on August 15;
• the conclusion of negotiations toward a Canada-Honduras free trade agreement;
• the tabling of legislation to enact free trade agreements with Jordan and Panama;
• continued progress toward a Canada-European Union trade agreement and a Canada-India trade agreement;
• Canada’s signing of the historic Anti-Counterfeiting Trade Agreement, which will combat trade in counterfeit and pirated goods while helping to ensure innovation- and knowledge-based prosperity;
• adoption of the Joint Declaration on Trade and Investment with the Association of Southeast Asian Nations to increase Canada’s trade and investment ties in the region;
• the launch of exploratory trade talks with Mercosur, South America’s largest common market;
• continued Canada’s leadership on the world stage in support of free and open trade;
• minister-led trade missions to Brazil, China and India—three of the largest and fastest-growing markets in the world;
• the announcement in November of Canada’s intention to enter into formal consultations to join negotiations on the Trans-Pacific Partnership; and
• the naming of an advisory panel of eminent Canadians to make recommendations that will help guide Canada’s International Education Strategy.

Sign of Decline

When DFAIT has to hire consultants to tell them what the security situation is for our embassy staff, it's all over.

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